Life is messy

Daylily stamen © Karen Thiessen's husband, 2014

The end of the year is in sight and I've been thinking about 2014 and all it has offered to date. Two successive car accidents caused by one distracted driver within a 45 minute time-frame in early April were my big rupture events of the year. One result is that I have a renewed sense of urgency: time is finite and I still have much to do. 

Another effect is that I've come to accept that life is messy. Although I'm not a perfectionist, prior to the accident I believed that if I worked long and hard enough, the messy corners of my life could be tidied... eventually. Not true. Regardless of time, effort, and intention some of my relationships will be messy. When my studio is tidy, my office will be a mess and when the garden looks fantastic, the windows will be dirty. Learning to acknowledge mess has resulted in improved family relationships. Accepting mess requires self-discipline, and this is counter-intuitive. Some things/relationships can't be repaired or neat all of the time, and others that have this potential, aren't necessarily worth the time investment. Life is short. I'd rather have a vibrant studio practice than a perfect house.